Work Attitude

Let me share this which I received yesterday from my usual supplier, Dr M* through chain e-mails (caveat - strictly for amusement only!):

From a strictly mathematical viewpoint, what makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Have you ever wondered about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?!? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How on earth are you supposed to be able to achieve 103%?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

What makes up 100% in life?

If:
A=1, B=2, C=3, D=4 and so on until Z=26

Then: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8 + 1 + 18 + 4 + 23 + 15 + 18 + 11 = 98%

and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11 + 14 + 15 + 23 + 12 + 5 + 4 + 7 + 5 = 96%

But,
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1 + 20 + 20 + 9 + 20 + 21 + 4 + 5 = 100%

However:
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2 + 21 + 12 + 12 + 19 + 8 + 9 + 20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you!
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1 + 19 + 19 + 11 + 9 + 19 + 19 + 9 + 14 + 7 = 118%

So, one can then conclude with mathematical certainty that:
While "Hard Work" and "Knowledge" may get you close, only "Attitude" will get you there.

But more importantly – never forget:
that "Bullshit" and "Ass Kissing" will put you over the top.

PS. For students and the academics amongst readers, "Studying Hard" will always beat all the above as "Studying Hard" will get you 150%!

Comments

Anonymous said…
hahahaha....this just cracked me up....hahaha..thanx for putting a smile on my face for the day :)
Tuesday, May 16, 2006 8:33:00 AM
Anonymous said…
nice way to start my day... cheers
Tuesday, May 16, 2006 9:46:00 AM
Anonymous said…
hello there, i have just started reading your stuff and it's really amusing and at the same time informative, love it......
Tuesday, May 16, 2006 5:00:00 PM
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